Jaded

I was recently called 'jaded', because I am difficult to tease. When I asked for some clarification, the response was: "Idk not much seems to impact you. Well certainly not as easily as other connections ive made on imvu. And thats okies." I am not really sure if Jaded is the right word, but we will go with it...

It has been a while since I allowed myself to lose myself in some online fantasy. And while I do know some people think that I am some internet pimp, the truth is that I am typically reserved with people I know online. I think it is because I came to a realization that anything digital, will eventually be erased from history. This blog; our digital photos; the whole internet, eventually will not exist. The only things that last, are physical objects, and physical connections. The only things worthy of a deep commitment, are the same.

Sure I know people who have been holding onto long distance relationships for years, with only minimal in person contact with the person they are holding onto. But while they wait, their life, their prime health, is passing by. Some people I do know have met their long time lovers, and things are going great. Others... different story. For me, I saw how much time and energy I put into an online relationship, and I saw how I began to neglect responsibilities in my life, and my own health, in order to sit at my computer and anxiously await communication with the one I loved. No more.

I no longer seek online relationships. Real life only relationships are all I will consider. And often, even then, I think the woman I have in my life is all I really need.